Have you heard of Trader Joe's?
No.
Trader Joe's??
That's a weird name.
Like they sell cars?
We have brought,
Some snacks for you.
What even are these?
I'm gonna love them.
My tongue is on fire.
That's to die for.
That's very nice.
Wow.
Trader Joe's is a popular grocery store.
They've kind of got a cult following for their own brand stuff.
A cult?
Almost.
Basically, people are big fans.
It's an expression.
Repeat after me.
I swear allegiance to Joe.
First up, milk chocolate covered peanut butter pretzels.
I thought that was dog food.
That looks like dog food.
Those look like dog food.
Literally every single person we've given that to.
Like that.
Smells very chocolatey.
That's actually really good.
Yeah.
Oh, brilliant.
That is brilliant.
They're really nice.
What's not to like?
Well, if you've got a peanut allergy.
I mean, that's really bad, isn't it?
I don't normally like stuff with peanut butter.
It's changed my mind.
Not the biggest fan of peanuts,
But that was actually surprisingly nice.
How good is that?
Horrible.
It's too nutty.
You don't like peanut butter?
That might be a problem.
You're going to be in trouble.
Next up.
Why does everything look like dog food?
Peanut butter cups.
I didn't even get to read it.
See what you think.
That's to die for. That's very nice.
It's amazing, actually.
Oh, straight in for another one.
You know they're going to be good, don't you?
It's the right thickness.
It's a good ratio, right?
I had Reese's about 20 minutes ago.
Oh, wow.
And this is actually much better.
Much better.
They're good, right? They're so good.
Theo, you've had four, I think.
The only reason that happened is because you guys are talking so.
OK.
My apologies.
This is brilliant.
Too much peanut butter.
I'd take them every day of the week.
Maybe you'll like these.
Mini milk chocolate peanut butter cups.
Why is everything chocolate and peanut?
Do they love their nuts in America?
Do they love peanut butter or something?
Like, what's your obsession with peanut butter?
These are just smaller versions of what we just had.
Can't taste nothing, so sweet.
We would finish these in seconds.
That's like one you pour in a handful.
Yeah.
Wow.
Yeah, there he goes.
Yeah.
Gave it a bit of a head shake, too.
Yeah.
That's good.
When you buy a box of chocolates, the worst thing is they're individually wrapped.
Chocolates would be better if there was no wrapping.
You'd rather this in front of the telly than them, wouldn't you?
Because you don't have to think about it.
Look, I'm not looking.
Just eating.
I still haven't gone down.
I've gone again.
You could go no hands.
Straight in yeah.
You wouldn't be able to like mistake this with dog food, though,
Because like your dog would be dead.
Yeah, no, that wouldn't be good.
Like a dog booby trap.
Next up.
So Joe also trades this?
He trades a lot of snacks.
He trades here, he trades there, he trades everywhere.
Me and Joe would get on really well.
Because these are going to be amazing.
More nuts.
Pecan pralines.
Pecan paralines.
Pecan pralines.
Pralines.
I go pralines.
You go pralines?
The problem is none of us know how to pronounce that.
I don't know how to pronounce it.
Pralines, pralines, pralines, something like that.
What's a pecan?
It looks kind of like wet, doesn't it? Look.
What even are these?
It's like crystals.
What is that, yeah?
Give it a taste.
Oh, it's brilliant! Absolutely brilliant.
They're better than the dog ones.
They're not dog ones!
That is so good.
It's strange.
No, it's so good.
They're like caramelised.
They are.
That is really good.
I could eat a lot of these.
It's such a weird, unique flavour.
Why is it so sweet?
I like these.
Yeah?
You have some weird taste buds, man.
These are nice.
Sugar, butter, vanilla.
Yeah, what's not to like?
Over a pecan.
Nah, it's disgusting.
Okay!
It's disgusting.
It's not the one at all.
How cheap would it have to be in order for you to buy them?
I don't think I'd pay anything.
How much would you have to be paid to take that?
I'd be paid anything.
That's a smart man.
That is a man who's just come out of a business exam.
Try and do that.
First try!
You should do it again now.
Just stop.
I'll retire.
Yeah, exactly.
Stop while your ahead.
Have you ever heard of an everything bagel?
No.
It's basically a bagel with all of the different seasonings.
Sesame seeds, poppy seeds, garlic powder, onion powder, salt, pepper.
Sounds like an arts and crafts session with a bagel.
Brutal
It kind of does.
People love those bagels so much.
They love those bagels so much.
This is what they call a bagel.
They've taken the seasoning from the top of the bagel and put it on crisps.
I don't know if I'm going to like this.
Yeah, me neither.
Underwhelming.
Okay.
It promised everything.
You literally get promised everything, don't you?
Oh, oh, gosh.
That was bad.
Okay.
That was bad.
That's enough.
No, man.
They taste like metal.
I'm not eating it.
That is awful.
They are weird.
They're very garlicky.
I kind of understand what you mean about metal.
It tastes like pure garlic.
It tastes like it smells.
Oh, really?
Okay.
I would have salmon cream cheese.
It's not in everything.
That's inside the bagel, not on top.
Oh, on the top?
This is basically a chip of sesame seeds?
It's not even a thing inside of it.
This is the boring bit on top.
It's just too much together.
It's like a three out of ten.
Wow.
No Americans are failing on this one.
Okay.
Next up.
This some b-tech takis bro.
Some b-tech takis.
Max would have finished this.
Oh.
Chips, chilli and lime.
Is Trader Joe's like an off-brand of everything?
I mean, they have their own brand versions of a lot of different snacks.
Joe's main thing is trading.
Okay.
He doesn't care too much about brand names.
He just wants to trade and stuff.
I don't really deal well with spice.
Rolled corn tortilla chips.
These are more limey, though.
My tongue is on fire.
No, they're fine.
This shouldn't be spicy.
Oh my gosh, that's so...
Yeah?
These are way better than Taki's.
They're good, right?
No.
Too spicy?
Why, do you not like them?
It's spicy.
It's not that spicy.
Can't go wrong with this.
Why lime?
What, is it too sour?
Yeah.
Imra, what's wrong with you?
I swear.
I love these.
Yeah, these are so good.
I mean, I can feel the spice, but it's not bad.
I love these two. They're like, "Eh, it's okay."
These are valid.
There's a lot.
There is a lot.
Yeah, Takis, they feel like halfway up the bag.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And they cost a lot more.
Yeah, I like them.
Proper flavour, innit?
I mean, they are strong.
My kids wouldn't cope with this.
Yeah, it's a lot.
It is a lot.
Considering the other
"Chips" as Americans would call them, are terrible,
This is a redeemer for the crisp section.
Best crisps so far?
Definitely.
I just want to apologise in advance.
Why is it more peanut butter.
Sandwich cookies.
These are massive.
I like the packaging.
What do you make?
Oh, that's a shame.
What do you mean?
Missing 2.
Yeah.
That is ridiculous, innit?
What's the point?
Why have they given you all of that?
These look great.
These are proper.
Yeah.
These are the ones.
That Oreo was insane.
Yeah.
It's like an oreo.
It's exactly like an oreo.
And peanut butter coating.
That's really good though.
It's a lot, isn't it?
You wouldn't be, like, you could have like one or two.
I don't know if I'm hungry, I would eat two packs.
Okay.
One or two packs.
They taste like a protein bar.
Interesting.
I think they've had so much peanut butter and chocolate now.
It's just a bit boring.
It's more subtle, isn't it?
It's nice.
I prefer like the box of minis.
Seven now, probably an eight earlier, if I had these first.
Seven, 7.5 I had earlier.
Alright.
Very specific rating.
They're very serious about the rating.
Next up.
Ja-pel-in-o.
Jalapeno.
I don't know how to say it.
Corn and rice puffs.
Crunchy and spicy snacks made with corn rice, quinoa and baked to perfection.
How do you pronounce that?
Quinoa.
Wait, is it jalapenos or is it jalapenos?
I think it's jalapenos.
So why is there a j though?
Because it's a silent j.
If it's silent, take it out.
That would make sense.
Am I being stupid or what?
No, you got a point.
No, but cool, cool.
If you was making the language, right?
Bro, you would have put a j in there for no reason, would you?
No, but some countries pronounce it differently, that's why.
They're nowhere near as spicy as real jalapenos.
They smell a bit dodgy to be fair.
I like that one more than Cheetos or something like that.
Because Cheetos, it feels like when you bite into it, there's not actually that much in the bite.
That one feels more compressed and it's like you're actually having a lot.
That's not even spicy at all.
Honestly, these are quite nice.
There's no flavour though.
This is quite nice.
I like the spice from it.
It's kind of like moreish.
I like Cheetos but without the flavour.
You can't compare it to Cheetos.
I taste broccoli.
Okay.
And it says jalapeno but it's not even spicy.
A bit polystyrene-y.
I'm still eating it.
Yeah, okay.
We actually haven't tried these.
Are they good?
Yeah, they're good.
You guys are just chowing down.
I'm presuming.
You both immediately liked it.
That's great.
That is good.
Heck yes.
They're light as well.
Now you guys are turning into us, eating them.
I like these.
I like these a lot.
They're supposed to be high schoolers.
Next up.
Dark chocolate covered marshmallows.
Oh, these are tea cakes.
These are tea cakes.
Yeah.
They look like them.
Gonna love them.
Why is Trader Joe not in England?
Why dark chocolate?
Yeah, dark chocolate is a very bad flavour.
It's like an old people's chocolate.
You know when your mum buys dark chocolate and you're like, why did you get dark chocolate?
She's like, so you didn't eat it?
That's soft.
These look great.
Oh my days.
That's nice. Wow.
Yeah.
Straight back for another one.
It's like chewing on like rubber.
Takes so long to chew.
The marshmallows are like, they're way more soft here.
You don't have to chew them as much to.
Yeah, it's a rip off version of tea cakes basically.
Okay.
You think we do tea cakes better?
Yeah.
You're three in.
Good?
Four in.
Wow.
What do you like about it?
Chocolate, marshmallow.
That's all I got to say.
He's making a lot of sense.
Yeah, no he is.
I feel stupid for even asking.
He was like, chocolate, marshmallow, you moron.
Such a good shop.
Such a good shop, isn't it?
It's very, I mean, we need to take you to America and actually visit because...
That's a cheap shop.
It's not an expensive...
Yeah, yeah.
Budget.
This is budget?
I mean imagine how big I'd be.
If you lived in America.
Yeah.
I think that's true for all of us.
I think we can safely say we'd all be twice the size.
And because it's dark chocolate, it's basically healthy.
Okay, next up, have you heard of Bamba?
He's a footballer, isn't he?
Bamba, puff, peanut and corn snacks.
It's quite a popular snack internationally.
We don't really have them in the UK.
These look like unseasoned wotsits.
They're like wotsits.
Yeah, but they're not cheese flavoured.
Peanuts.
Peanut dust.
No.
They don't taste of anything.
They don't taste like anything.
There's literally no flavour in that.
No flavour on it.
It's like eating a cloud.
It tastes like nothing.
It's like eating baby food really.
They're good but they're very bland.
If I hadn't read that, probably after eating half a pack I'd know what the flavour is.
Okay.
So, Joe, you could become so famous if you brought this here and all over the world.
Wow.
And you're a trader so you should be coming here.
You should be really trading internationally.
Is Joe actually a real person?
Well, I mean, we've just made an appeal to him so I hope he is.
Let us know in the comments, Joe.