you know to that point I always said
there's no God I literally hated God I
always told myself he's not real
so I remember that I I was afraid to
leave so I did this prayer in the corner
of the room before I left and I said
God I don't know who you are
I don't know if you exist
but if you do I need you to help me
I am going to leave this house
and I don't ever want to come back to
this abuse
so I need you to help me
all I remember is I knew that my parents
were catholic
and I remember just seeing a cross in my
house they would have a big cross with
Jesus and I knew that he was the son of
God but I didn't know what Jesus had
done for me
and based on that I didn't know I could
have a relationship with him I didn't
know that he loved me or what was the
price of the Cross what he did in that
moment for me
especially since I grew up you know an
abusive household both of my parents
were alcoholic my mom was a diabetic so
due to that when I was born I only had a
three percent chance of living I was
born with a hernia and one kidney
unfortunately my mother passed away when
I was four years old due to her
lifestyle when my mother passed away
there was a downstairs neighbor that my
dad would leave me when she was
hospitalized at times so she moved with
us when my mom passed away I didn't know
what was happening at the moment but I
do remember that my dad sat me down and
was like you know she's going to be
living with us and she had a son with
her from her previous relationship so he
moved with us as well and he asked me
that day she's moving in with us did you
want to call her mom or do you want to
call her by her name
and I remember that I said I want to
call her mom
you know when she moved in with us
things changed in my life I was four
years old when my mom died so
immediately
she started asking me to help her clean
the house I thought that I was helping
her but I didn't know that it was abuse
I say abuse because when I wouldn't
claim the house correctly or I wouldn't
um
wake up on time she would start hitting
me she would start beating me and this
led to a long abuse but I especially
remember when I started school it was
very hard for me because I was five
years old so I had to be woken up at
three four in the morning when my dad
would leave to work because he had two
jobs so I had to be ready for school
around seven and she told me I could not
go to school unless the house was clean
so I started that life at five years old
and I remember that if I didn't finish
cleaning I would get a beating and I
would have to stay home cleaning all day
so I remember that I told myself you
have to clean the house so you can go to
school because school was kind of like
my freedom when I did get a chance to go
to school I wasn't able to do my
homework you know she would tell me you
cannot bring homework into the house and
if I did she would throw my homework
away so I wasn't able to really study at
home or really focus in school because
of the beatings and everything and she
never treated her son that way it was
always me so I never knew why I was the
target of that abuse
that abuse kept happening in my life and
you know as I got older the buildings
changed because I was able to protect
myself so the buildings will come from
she started putting my hands in the
stove which now that's why my hands are
very hard I remember that um she hit me
with wires she would throw my face in
the wall you know and I didn't
understand but I knew that I wasn't
brave enough to speak because I was
scared so I was always threatened by her
and um
my dad never noticed because my dad had
two jobs so she would work morning and
she will make sure that I was in bed by
the time my dad got home so my dad
couldn't see the bruises or I couldn't
talk to him or he wouldn't see because
sometimes my face was really swollen
from the crying that I had
um so that could happen in for school
the counselors didn't even notice that I
was being because she will make me wear
long sleeves and cover myself up and she
would threaten me if you say anything
you're gonna come home and get a bean
again so I didn't want that so I
wouldn't speak my dad would be home in
the weekends but I remember that she
would warn me on Friday and say you
cannot speak if you do on Monday you're
gonna get a beating so that was my life
until about the age of 15 I felt like I
would have some sort of freedom but I
didn't I say 15 because this is when I
was told that I can get a job so I tried
to get a job at a retail store and I did
start working there but um her
controlling ways just kept following me
around so if I had to bring my schedule
at home from work and she would call my
job to make sure I was at work and what
time I will get out
so I never really had freedom my school
grades were awful I was never able to
get good grades they were always like
below below average and the teachers
never said anything I was surprised that
no one ever reached out and really said
anything so I really had no way of
escape and I didn't know why my life was
like that I I always questioned like why
do why am I living like this like it's
not life and I obviously I would see the
difference with her son so out of that
marriage my dad also had um two separate
kids with her so none of them got
treated that way it was always me so I
kept going I kept working trying to do
my best trying to get her approval
um the abuse still happened I I remember
that I graduated high school and I
thought that finally I was going to be
able to be free
um the abuse was last when I was getting
older but it was still my mind was
already conditioned to to her being the
way she was with me and I remember that
in school people would see because I I
was always the girl that couldn't dress
in style or you know was always quiet
because I I wouldn't speak so people
knew that I was going through something
but they wouldn't say anything when I
graduated I remember that I was I tried
to date it was my first boyfriend so he
knew that I was going through the abuse
but he wouldn't say anything so he would
the way we would date is that you know
if I would go to work he would meet me
halfway and we would just see each other
really quick we had our on and off
relationship for four years and out of
those four years I had my daughter I had
a daughter and due to me having my
daughter
um I think God used her and led away
from my Escape because when my daughter
was two years old I did have a cousin
that would help me watch her while I
worked and this cousin started noticing
that my stepmother would try and take
control of my daughter at the age of two
like she would tell her oh I will I'm
gonna watch the her child you just clean
the house
so the cousin was like Hey you know I
noticed that um your stepmother doesn't
really want me to watch your daughter
and you're paying me to watch your
daughter and I don't think that's right
and then she would tell me you know she
feeds your daughter voices to feed your
daughter and I don't like that there's
something going on but don't say it's me
so then I started noticing the the
pattern that it was coming again the
abuse and I was like this cannot be
happening in my head
at that time my stepbrother her son was
like you need to pay more rent you need
to start paying more rent because you
have a daughter so you're using twice
the water twice the food
Etc and I was like I can't because if I
get two jobs I won't have time with my
daughter it's not fair
so that's when I thought I had to make a
decision
and since I was working at a a retail
store I had a co-worker that was going
through a divorce and you know I would
tell her some of my things and she
offered me to move in with her because
she needed someone to help her so I took
that opportunity and I said okay this is
my only way I'm gonna risk it because I
didn't want my daughter to go through
that and of course I couldn't speak you
know I couldn't say anything for myself
I didn't have the courage but I did have
the courage for my daughter
so I remember that um I had already
planned to move out with my co-worker I
started packing my stuff little by
little I didn't tell anyone and
literally I remember that the day when I
was going to move because my co-worker
was going to come help me move the stuff
it was a weekend and I had never talked
to God
because I blamed God for my mom's death
you know to that point I always said
there's no God I literally hated God I
always told myself he's not real
so I remember that I I was afraid to
leave so I did this prayer in the corner
of the room before I left and I said
God I don't know who you are
I don't know if you exist
but if you do I need you to help me
I am going to leave this house
and I don't ever want to come back to
this abuse
so I need you to help me
and that's the only prayer I did and I
remember that I got my stuff my
co-worker took it and left I remember
that my dad asked me why I was leaving
but my stepmother told him that I was
leaving because I wanted to be with the
father of my daughter
which it wasn't the case
so my dad just let it be he thought that
I had left in Rebellion which I did not
so I move in with this co-worker
everything seems fine from the beginning
you know she's helping me out we work in
the same place everything is good and
later I started noticing little patterns
um she's becoming a little bit
controlling kind of the same thing as my
stepmother and during that time she
wasn't she was going through a divorce
so I learned that she was
um attracted to me you know in a
different way
so at that moment of course I didn't
know anything so that's when I started
experimenting in that side you know so I
started a relationship with her at that
moment and I think it lasted for a while
until I started seeing someone else a
male this time and I really built a
relationship with him and she knew it I
didn't thought she mind you know but it
did bother her so when I started that
relationship with that guy she decided
to bring her brother into the house to
live with us and pretty much her brother
was like a bodyguard to make sure when I
left when I come back if I was there
when I said I would be there
so I started being afraid I felt like
again this controlling pattern and one
thing that she always told me she's like
don't go in my room we will sleep in
separate rooms and she would tell me
that but one day I was cleaning the the
room the house and she left her room
unlocked and when I walked in I saw a
black magic book I've never heard of
black magic I didn't know what it was
and I remember that I opened the book
and I was like
um what is this I just kept reading and
I saw that she had a prayer in there
and I was like okay this is weird so
when she came home that day I told her I
said why why is this book here and then
she said oh my grandmother taught me
that you know she didn't confess to me
at that moment but it was through a
friend of ours that told me that she was
doing black magic on me
so then okay I I had to make a choice at
that moment I had a friend that I would
talk to so I will tell her what I was
going through and she's like hey move
with me like my parents are renting a
room move with me so I said okay but I
said you need to help me because I need
to sneak out of here they won't let me
leave so I remember that I told her
we're gonna wait for the guy to go to
sleep and then when he goes to sleep
you're gonna throw the stuff out you're
gonna help me so it happened that way
she came I threw myself out of the
balcony I grabbed my daughter and I left
and then whatever I left I left it there
and I never looked back
so I'm moving this was in this new
roommate
I know her since high school so I
thought everything was going to be good
I couldn't do laundry in the house so I
had to go out to a laundromat and do
laundry so in one of the times that I
went to do laundry this I didn't know
she was a medium how do you know about
that but this medium approached me and
she was like oh I'm doing a free
readings can I read your hand and I was
like sure go ahead and read my hand and
um I remember that encounter because I
cried because no one had ever told me
that they knew about my suffering
so she described my life about the
suffering I lived when I was young so
that really moved me and I thought oh
man like someone finally someone knows
you know and she said I can help you
like I can help you but um you have to
pay me so if you want to come tonight to
my studio I'll give you your the address
and you can come and I was like yes like
I'll go so she told me to bring money
she told me that Mama had to bring and I
was so excited you know because I wanted
to be free I wanted to know what my life
was the way it was I didn't understand
um so I remember that I went that same
night I couldn't wait I went that same
night and um she said that she was gonna
do a reading for me and with the cards
so I remember I walked in the studio
um she started doing her readings
everything was normal she was she kept
confirming to me the abuse and she also
um told me that she can have me speak to
my mother my mother was dead but I I
knew that I didn't want to do that you
know I didn't want to bother my mom
because she was dead so she offered me
that I said no leave my mother alone
um so there was a moment when she was
reading the car and she was pulling the
cards everything was fine I remember
that one she pulled one card and when
she pulled this card she just went
and then I was like in my in me I
thought oh my gosh she saw the card of
death you know like this is it
and she just stayed shocked and she was
like can I ask you a question
and I said yeah she's like do you know
who God is
and I was like I've heard of him you
know and she's like do you know who the
god of the Bible is I said no like no
you know I I don't and then she was like
well when I was pulling the cards out an
angel appeared to me and told me that I
couldn't continue being the cards to you
because you know God wants to speak to
you and I was like how do you know God
if you're a witch you know like it
didn't make sense to me
and I remember that when I was sitting
like there was a purple current behind
me and she got up and she's like come
here so I turned around because I was
kind of scared and she opened the
curtains and when she opened the
curtains there was about six people
sitting on the floor eating food from a
plate
and she said I know who the god of the
Bible is
and I know what I'm doing but I have to
do it because in my country this is what
we do and I need to feed them
so I was like oh wow
so then she closed the curtain and she
went back to sit and I just like was in
shock and she's like so God is asking me
to ask you if he can talk to you and in
my head I was like why is he asking me
and she was like God is asking you
because he's a gentleman so he has to
ask you permission and then I sat there
and I thought about it and I was
confused and I was like fine
what does he have to say so the first
thing she told me okay he wants you to
know that he loves you
and when she said that I started crying
because I was like that's not true if he
loved me
why is my life like this
but I guess God knew what I was thinking
so she said
God said that he wants to help you but
he can help you because you don't allow
him in your life you don't let him in
and it's true because I hated him so I
never thought about him and I didn't
know how this relationship didn't work I
didn't know she said God says that he's
that you have two choices right now
either you accept them
and you um look for him or I continue
reading the cards but I can continue to
help you if you don't make a choice you
have to make a choice either God or this
so I didn't know and of course I still
had that negative thought about him in
my mind so I remember I said no I don't
want God like continue so from there she
was able to close whatever she was
seeing she's like okay I can continue
now because obviously I denied him you
know so she kept reading the cards and
you know she kept just um after she
finished reading the card she just like
okay this is what I can do to help you
so she gave me some potions some Pebbles
some body washes to do and she gave me
like a schedule to watch myself and like
the instances and she said that this
will cleanse my life and it would help
me so I took it I believed it and she
told me that when I ran out I can always
call her to get more to renew myself
so I took them with me and I did did do
what she told me to do you know I didn't
know any better I thought that it was
gonna work also before I left she told
me oh and the roommate you're living
with you have to be careful because she
is not good so you need to move out of
there I didn't know what was gonna
happen but a week later
a week or so I think almost two I
couldn't find my credit card in my
wallet I was like where's my credit card
and I checked my bank balance no money
gone
I was like okay I remember that I called
to make a fraud report I came back to
the house I told my roommate what had
happened she never said anything she
acted like if nothing ever happened she
knew about it later I had to call the
police to get my money back so I had to
make a report and once I did that she
admitted that she has stolen my money
so here we go again I had to find
somewhere else to go because obviously I
could not live there anymore so I
contacted another high school friend and
she told me that I can move with her
it's so here I go I grab my daughter and
I move again I had no money
um so I had to take money out of my 41k
at that moment you know my car was
breaking down
um so I had to use that money to get a
new car I moved with my new roommate and
to find out she's also doing witchcraft
so it's like this thank you's following
me and um
thank God that when I was there living
with her a friend from a high school she
became Christian uh during high school
so everyone knew that she was Christian
and she called me and she was like Hey
you know I haven't spoken to you like I
want to invite you to my church like we
have a church event I want you to come
and she had invited me before but I
always denied it I was like I don't want
to know about God like you know this is
he's not real like so remember that
um she invited me and I said I'll think
about it you know but part of me didn't
feel right because I was doing the
Witchcraft not just what I did but with
this new roommate I was learning new
things you know so I something in me it
was like I cannot go to God if I have
this stuff so I remember that
um I thought about it and I said okay
I'm gonna go to church but before I go
to church I'm going to get rid of this
stuff
so the only thing that came to my head
was like I'm gonna go to the nearest
church and throw this away because I
don't want it I want God
so I remember that I grabbed everything
and where I lived there was like a
Catholic church so I remember that I
walked in the church and it was empty
and I just ran to the Altar and I threw
everything into the altar
and I said God like
I want you
I don't know what to do but I need you
and I just left it there
and I never looked back and I called my
friend and I said okay I'll go to church
with you
so I went to that church event
and I remember that I accepted Christ I
didn't know what I was doing and I
didn't know what it meant you know I
heard the preaching I saw the event and
the pastor did the call and I said okay
but I never came back you know I didn't
come back I kept living my lifestyle
um I didn't do the Witchcraft anymore
but I just you know started Living a
very promiscuous lifestyle you know I
didn't know what love was so I was
confused you know being intimate with
someone as love I just started you know
doing this stuff and I remember that
um I lost my job so things just started
going downhill from there instead of
doing better I had no money I was like
not using my money wisely my car was
messing up again
I was like okay thank God that that same
friend called me a year later and she
was like Hey we're having a church event
do you want to come and I was like oh
man I need to go like I need help so I
said yeah I'll go and I remember that I
went to this church event again
and I accepted Christ again but then
this time when I accepted Christ I
remember that when I accepted Christ I
would always have back pain I had back
pain for at least four years and I would
go to doctors because since I only had
one kidney I thought my kidneys were
failing but the doctors were like no
you're fine you're fine everything's
fine so I never understood why the back
pain was so heavy and I remember that
day when I accepted Christ that time
something Supernatural lifted off me I
felt to lift on me I didn't know what it
was what had happened I just knew that
something was lifting off me
and due to that experience I decided to
come back so I started coming back week
after week after week and I remember
that one of those weekends when I came
we had a guest bedroom and he came to me
he's like oh you know that back pain you
had God healed you from it
and it had not hit me until he gave me
that word
and I started walking against I started
reflecting oh my God it's true I don't
have that back pain so that's what it
was lifted at that day
so from that experience I kept coming
um after eight months of being in a
church I got baptized
I didn't know the process that I had to
go through after my baptism
um I remember the after I got baptized
an hour later we started worshiping the
Lord you know in this Retreat place and
I had always worshiped God before
getting baptized so nothing weird had
happened but after my baptism something
started manifesting inside of me as I
was worshiping the Lord I kept coughing
I felt like I couldn't breathe I kept
grabbing my own throat and to the point
where I fell because I felt like I
couldn't breathe until one of the guest
creatures we had that day I guess God
showed him what was happening and he was
like oh my God it's like she did
witchcraft like that's what's happening
so obviously those Spirits did not want
me to Worship the Lord you know so I
remember that they took me to the back
and they were like did you do witchcraft
and of course I had to confess that I
did so they they helped me deliver
myself there but um that wasn't just my
first Deliverance that I had to deliver
myself from all the fornication I did
all the strongholds that I had you know
I also struggled a lot with masturbation
and pornography
um so it was a process that I had to go
through and it was like a constant every
weekend Deliverance Deliverance
deliverance and I was like oh my god
um and also through that process it was
hard for me because I will keep falling
into fornication as God was working in
me I couldn't let go because I felt that
was love again I confused it so of
course the Lord had to come back in
again and put me back in the right path
so it was a continuous healing process
for me I also the Lord revealed to me
that I had a lot of forgiveness to do
um due to the past that I had lived I
had to
forgive my stepmother
and
that was one of the hardest things
that I had to do because I didn't
understand I told God why if she hurt me
why do I have to ask her for forgiveness
and the Lord told me
because you've held so much anger
it's become a stronghold and you need to
ask her for forgiveness for all the
anger that you held in her for her
and I was like I was scared to her I had
not talked to her ever since I left the
house and um
I just said okay you want me to do it I
need you to do it because I can I can
approach this woman
so I just left it like that
and I remember that um I hadn't really
talked to my dad much
um if I were copy me for his birthday or
Christmas or something and I remember
that um one of those days we were gonna
go out
and I went to the house where he lived
with my stepmother and he told me to go
inside and I just did I just went inside
and he's he I remember that um I saw my
stepmother I saw my stepsisters and my
dad was like oh I have to get something
in the room really quick and my
stepmother and I were left alone in the
kitchen and she was like oh hey like I
heard you're Christian now and I was
like yeah I am so it's weird how you
know it came about to be and she was
like you know I wanted to ask you for
forgiveness
for everything I did to you
I know that it was wrong
and I said no God told me that I had to
ask you for forgiveness because I hated
you for so long I had so much anger
towards you and I'm sorry for that
and I remember that we both cried and we
hugged each other
and I received that forgiveness healing
that I needed too I no longer saw her as
an evil person but as you know a victim
you know she also needs Freedom so the
Lord kept working with me and the Lord
also told me that I had to go back to
school
this was a desire that I always had as a
child I always wanted to go to college I
wanted to pursue a career but obviously
I couldn't because my grades were just
awful and due to the fact that I
couldn't concentrate in school and I
couldn't do my homework my grammar was
just really bad I didn't even know my
punctuations where the karma went
whether nothing went and I was like God
how am I going to get into college like
this is ridiculous so I remember that I
just applied
and I didn't get in I didn't get in
because I failed the grammar part
so I waited another year and I went
again
and you know I had to ask my daughter
for help because I had not studied and I
I knew I was gonna fill the gram apart
so thankfully
it was a humbling experience but I was
able to get through with the help of my
daughter so I got accepted into college
and um you know God was very graceful
through that period for me like he put
Grace in my teachers they were very
understanding and now I have my
bachelor's degree so I give God all the
glory because she's restored that
desired enemy you know
and um the Lord also told me that he was
going to bring my father back so I was
like what you know he had been married
to this woman for 35 years I didn't know
what God was going to do or why he was
going to bring my dad back because I
told God
my child years are done you know like I
can never get those back but the Lord
told me he needs Freedom too
so I'm going to free him and he's going
to come to you
um so I remember that um One time my dad
um gave me a call and he was like hey do
you want to go out tweet I was like sure
you know let's go out to eat so we went
to eat and when we sat down we started
talking and he's like I have a question
for you
but I just want you to answer me with a
yes or a no and I was like okay sure
so he was like did this person abuse you
and of course he said my Stepmother's
name so I said yes
she did
and I remember that
I couldn't believe I had said yes you
know and then we just left it a lot we
ate it was kind of weird but we ate and
I went home
and then uh two days later he calls me
and he reveals to me that he had a dream
that he was asking God
you know why doesn't Gina love me like
why doesn't my own daughter love me and
in the dream he said that Jesus appeared
and told him the Gina that you see is
not the Gina Who is
and so he showed him two Gina's so the
first Gina is the one that was abused so
God showed him that I was there and my
stepmother was abusing me and then the
second Gina is the one that is the one
that does love you
so once he got that dream that's when he
called me to ask me you know when we
went out to eat so from there he made he
was already having problems with her and
I guess that guy was already working on
him for that for that freedom so after
that conversation he asked me if he can
move in with me and of course I was
excited so I said yes and I knew that it
was the promise of God to free him and
bring him back so now I've been living
with my dad for three years going you
know I can never get that back but just
the moments that I have now with him and
you know he's learning about Jesus he's
seeing me we've talked about everything
I did there's no secrets and I know that
the Lord is working and it's giving me
that back that that relationship with my
father you know so I'm thankful that God
gave him back to me
and the last thing that the Lord decided
to work in was in me you know I look at
it back now and I'm like wow the Lord
had me first forgive all those people
before working in me
so before
um this healing internal healing
happened I was going through a lot of
battles in my church you know my church
I've been there for nine years now but
there was a period in my time where I
didn't want to submit I didn't want to
submit to my leaders especially not to
my pastor and the reason for my pastor I
mean that's a meeting it's crazy because
you know a pastor is an authority figure
so that authority figure was abused in
my mind due to a parent being an
authority figure too so my stepmother
abused that figure you know so in my
mindset I couldn't really get close to
my pastor because I felt she was going
to abuse me you know she's going to
abuse that Authority just like my
stepmother did and I always desired for
my pastor to be my mom you know the
female possibly my mom
but I couldn't it was a wrestle that I
had
so I decided to leave I was like I'm
gonna go to another church you know
because I can't do it here anymore you
know and I remember that I went started
going to another church and the Lord
told me that I had to go back you know I
did attend that church for like maybe
six seven months
and um there was a special guest and
this guest spoke to me
like no Prophet had ever spoken to me in
my life he spoke to me from birth and he
revealed to me why I've been abused all
these years
so it's a generational curse because my
mom was abused her mom was abused my
grand mother was abused my dad was
abused wow so it came to me and it had
stopped here and if you if you see back
it wanted to continue with my daughter
but the Lord did not permit
so I learned that the abuse was a
generational curse
and the Lord spoke to me that day and
told me that from that day on I was not
going to be the same that I was going to
love myself that I was going to forgive
myself and that I would see myself the
way Jesus sees me which I had no idea
what that was
and I remember that I got a Deliverance
that day but I promise you the next day
when I woke up and I remember the day
because I put my feet in the ground and
it's like I was standing in a new room
like I was not me the old Gina I was the
new me I saw myself in the mirror and I
was like wow I am beautiful like I am
loved you know I am able
I saw myself with this new identity
so the Lord sent me back to my church
and um
I was able to speak to my pastor and
tell her why I was the way it was now
before you get to that point you
actually share this part with me and I
think it's a beautiful part about what
the pastor from the other Church told
you could you share that with us because
you you left your church right and you
went to this new church and then you
received a message that sent you back to
your church could you tell us what what
happened there
yes
um so like I said that that guest the
Lord revealed to him that you know why I
was abused for so long
I also revealed to him that um you know
the Lord had placed this pastor as an
authority in my life
and that the Lord had planted me in that
church the church where I left and that
in order for me to keep walking and
receive the blessings that the Lord had
for me I had to keep growing where he
planted me
you know he's like so you're gonna
you're going to go back and you're going
to submit to that Authority and when you
submit your authority of God you will
see that the door the doors will open
for you
and I remember that he anointed me he
blessed me and he said you have to go
back like there's no other way
and I remember that I had conviction for
the first time I was like okay I'm wrong
I am wrong
that conviction I I Wrestled a couple in
my thoughts but I was like no I know
that I have to submit I have to let go
of this fear because the Lord was also
looking was mostly looking out for me
there's a fear I had that I had never
told my pastor spoken that I still
authority figure that caused me to run
away
so by me going back I pretty much faced
that fear that I had of thinking that
anyone with authority was going to abuse
it
now that I have I have a wonderful
relationship with my pastor and you know
she's the mother figure that I didn't
have
and I thank God because I can see how
the enemy did not want me to see her as
a mother because I would I I now I feel
complete I have my dad I have my pastor
which is my spiritual mom but she's also
I call her my mom
and I Feel Complete you know and I thank
the Lord because if that wouldn't have
happened you know we would have gone
anywhere
and thanks to that I'm able to love
myself too I forgave myself for
everything that I did to myself during
those years you know all the the abuse
that I let in me you know all those
negative thoughts that I had of me you
know I didn't know that I had an
identity in Jesus you know so once the
Lord freed me from that mentality
because it was attacks of the enemy in
my mind for all these years you know I
only received rejection abuse so the
Lord freed me from that and since that
day I love myself and now that I love
myself I can love others
because when I didn't love myself I was
so bitter even though I was in the
gospel and Walking with God I was still
bitter I couldn't understand why some
people were happy it looked so happy but
I wasn't of course God was still working
in me there was happy moments in my life
but there was something in me that was
not happy and that's because I didn't
love myself and I couldn't love others
and now that I'm able to love myself my
vision has changed my heart has changed
it has opened to love people how Jesus
loves people so I thank the Lord for
that and you know the Lord redeemed me
he redeemed me from the past you know he
everything that the enemy tried to take
away the Lord has brought it back has
restored it and is giving me and it's
going to give me more so you know I
Praise Jesus for that
Gina who is Jesus to you
Jesus is my best friend
he is a
My Redeemer
he's my savior
he came to redeem everything and Save Me
From Myself
Gina for anybody who is watching right
now who um is feeling discouraged
who is connecting with your story of
abuse
of even rejection towards God maybe
they're in that place right now where
they don't want anything to do with God
what can you say to those people
watching
and who are connecting with your
testimony right now
I know that it's hard to look at Jesus
as a savior at this moment
I know that you might be angry like I
once was
or feel like you're unloved and unwanted
or you're questioning your life like why
is your life like this
but the only answer is Jesus
the only way is Jesus that's why he died
for us so that we have we can have a
life so that we can have joy so we can
have peace so we can have Redemption
through him
and it's gonna take it might take a
while it might take but if you call on
Jesus even if it's a simple prayer
he will meet you where you are he will
come to you because Jesus came to me you
know I didn't go to him I didn't want to
go to him
but just that one sinful prayer
and he found me
so I encourage you guys not to lose hope
and to look to Jesus he is your friend
he's your father he's your Redeemer and
he is love he loves you
Gina any last words to the people
watching your testimony right now
yes so as I prayed last night I felt you
know the Lord telling me to tell you
guys to not throw in the towel
it is time to be free and to be healed
it's your season
stop allowing the paint to be extended
when God has given you the opportunity
through Jesus Christ
thank you