hey there Mr redder here welcome back to
another episode of r slash entitled
people stories our first story we'll be
reading today my Karen wife tried to
force my mom to eat her cooking after
that am I the jerk for expecting my son
to share his room and after that don't
want to pay me for my work alright I'll
undo it
now for every thumbs up this video gets
one Karen does not get to force anyone
to eat their cooking fine with me you
don't need to eat my food you could
stand to lose a few pounds Reddit boy so
please smash that like button and
subscribe and turn on notifications for
new stories from Reddit every single day
my Karen wife tried to force my mom to
eat her cooking my mom is not a picky
eater she will eat almost anything
unless it has ketchup on or in it also
growing up I was never made to eat
anything it was my body my choice and
she would make me a second meal I'm not
sure my wife knows about the ketchup
thing as she has only cooked for my mom
a few times and it just didn't come up
the two of them cannot stand each other
so I have greatly cut back on how often
I see my mom but recently she was
invited over to meet our daughter and my
wife asked if she wanted to stay for
dinner as we were catching up and I
don't see her often my mom agreed but
when she realized we were having
meatloaf with ketchup topping she only
took mashed potatoes and zucchini my
wife questioned her and my mom said she
doesn't eat meatloaf due to the ketchup
my wife said as a guest you just eat it
my mom said she was sorry if someone
raised my wife to believe that my mom
tried to sit down and eat her vegetables
but my wife blew up and demanded she eat
the meatloaf my mom said if she put any
on her plate she would throw it I told
them both firmly to stop and my wife
demanded that I defend her I told her to
just leave my mom alone and let her eat
what she wants to my wife began to yell
at me that I need to defend our home and
family my mom then said she was done and
walked out I asked her to stay but she
just walked out and my wife did not
speak to me for the rest of the night
the way I see it everyone should be able
to turn down food for any reason and
everyone is entitled to some foods they
absolutely will not eat
not the jerk and that's a big red flag
on your wife's part she's not respecting
your mom's personal boundaries choices
and autonomy as a guest you just have to
eat it I wouldn't be a guest for another
second your wife is unhinged not the
jerk I'm sorry she's treating your
mother this way she's going to do the
same thing to your kids too you know
that right you better get this figured
out now not the jerk as a guest you just
eat it does not sit right with me and
the guest is not obligated to eat
everything what if they're allergic to
something your wife would be responsible
for it
well who do you think is the jerk op's
wife or his mom please let us know op's
wife needs to take a chill pill growing
up the only thing that I would eat was
tendies and if my parents threw a fit
about that hi crayon doll I'd crayoned
all over the wall am I the jerk for exp
that was funny crayon all over the wall
am I the jerk for expecting my son to
share his room background my 40 female
husband 40 male and I bought a
three-bedroom house a few years ago
shortly before lockdown we of course
took the master bedroom and the other
two bedrooms went to our kids who were
then 12 and 10. we put a very nice
double bed in the larger room and a
single bed in the smaller room and told
them both that they could choose their
rooms but whoever ended up in the larger
room may be asked to share or relocate
for visiting family members while
whoever ended up in a smaller room would
have it to themselves always we almost
never have family over hubby and I are
both only kids and our parents are in
other provinces so we were surprised
when our older daughter chose the
smaller room and our younger son chose
the larger room but okay they worked it
out between themselves both seemed happy
with the choice so okay and it has
remained that way for a couple of years
now we have a four day weekend coming up
my kids are now 15 and 12 and my mother
decided to come down to visit of course
we told her okay my husband and I as we
hadn't seen each other in a while and I
told our son what the larger room in bed
that grandma would be here for a few
days and would be using his bed well my
son threw a fit he didn't want to share
a room with Grandma not even on an air
mattress not even for three nights she
smells funny so we reminded him of the
original deal and offered to put the air
mattress in the living room but that
wasn't enough he'd have no privacy there
his sister offered to let him put the
air mattress in her room which she
wasn't required to do and that wasn't
okay either my husband and I offered to
let him put the air mattress in our room
and he said no to that because sharing a
room with your parents uh God bless the
privilege but whatever
finally I put my foot down and said the
condition of you having the bigger room
was that you would give it up for
visiting family members so one way or
another you're sleeping on an air
mattress for three nights you can choose
if the air mattress goes in your room or
our room or the living room or literally
any room in this house but you are
sleeping on an air mattress while
grandma is here
shortly after that confrontation my
husband came to me and suggested that we
encourage my mom to stay in a hotel I
asked him who was going to pay for that
hotel since she can't afford it we can't
afford to put her up and he went silent
now he's calling me the jerk for forcing
our son to give up his room for all of
three nights and suggesting that I tell
my mom not to come at all since
apparently none of us can afford it edit
I sincerely appreciate everyone's
comments and judgments but I have
officially reached the point where every
time I look at my notifications it adds
to every second without me even having
to hit refresh clearly I should have
posted this on my main account since
apparently Reddit karma is important in
some way to follow the common am I the
jerk Trend and respond to some common
themes one why don't I offer my own and
my husband's bed to my mom my husband
has back problems so also cannot viably
sleep on an air mattress I will not be
going into detail on this I also assume
that it will be incredibly obvious to
everyone why it is not viable for my
husband and my mother to sleep in one
together while I sleep on an air
mattress not to mention that she would
never allow me to give up my bed for her
as a visitor 2. why doesn't my mom sleep
on the couch or air mattress she's 83
years old need I say more 3. anything
involving my son and daughter switching
rooms my daughter is willing to help in
the short term but she seems a bit smug
right now about the overall room choice
so she has no desire to switch rooms and
I will not force her because what kind
of parent would I be if I hold my son to
the letter of his deal but go back on my
words of my daughter you may decide I'm
the jerk and I'll accept that but I'm
not a hypocrite 4. I'm fully aware of
the Privacy that my son needs we've had
that conversation and at the prompting
of a couple of commenters I have also
recently asked my husband if there was a
private conversation between him and my
son that would in some way change the
situation he said no since I do not
currently have any reason to believe my
husband would lie to me outright I'm
considering that conversation closed 5.
rest in peace my DMs apparently I didn't
know that happened to 40-something
married moms but please know that I'm
not interested
not the jerk your son sounds a bit
entitled if he can't survive three
nights on an air mattress while his
grandmother is there expecting him to
share a bed or a room with her would be
excessive but there are presumably other
spaces in a three-bedroom house where he
could crash edit to all the people
saying you're the jerk because a 12 year
old needs privacy safe space Etc I can't
help but think how entitled a society
we've become and the past decades two to
three kids would share a room through
their entire child in teenage years and
even today there are tons of kids living
in miserable conditions and slums
refugee camps and other similar
situations and op is being called a jerk
for telling her son that he has to
vacate his room for three nights while
his 60 or 70 something year old grandma
visits so that she doesn't have to sleep
on an air mattress or stay in a hotel
just wow I second this people are also
forgetting that this was a pre-made
Arrangement if the sun didn't want to
share he could have picked a smaller
room but no he wanted the bigger one so
he needs to abide by the condition put
in place like it's three days he needs
to get over himself acting as if it's
for three months not the jerk this sub
is obviously full of kids who think
three days on an air mattress which he
agreed to is akin to some form of
mistreatment that will leave him scarred
well into his adult life I think he can
give his grandmother his bed and stop
being a brat which nothing against him
but his fairly typical kid Behavior I
occasionally had to do the same for my
grandparents in hindsight it was
obviously the right call you're not
putting your elderly parents on a darn
air mattress that's Insanity not the
jerk you've made the conditions clear
and now he is unhappy that they're
happening to him for context I'm the
oldest of three and had a similar
arrangement I chose the biggest and best
room after my parents which also had a
bathroom next door that essentially
became my private bathroom the
arrangement was that I was always the
one who had to give up the room to
guests also because I got a double bed
while I didn't love giving up my room I
under understood that was the price of
having such a good room to begin with
also I usually would give up my room for
one or two weeks at a time a four day
weekend is nothing your son got the room
he wanted and is now looking to reneg on
the deal you've given him various
options but it's clear he simply does
not intend to keep his word your husband
thinks the person to compromise to his
Tantrums is your guest but there is
another option he loses the room
entirely and it goes to your daughter
going forward
you're the jerk I'm a certified youth
counselor I work with kids and parents
on a day-to-day basis if there's one
thing that kids absolutely need it's a
safe space where they can have privacy
by invading your son's safe space and
forcing him to share a room with his
grandma someone he doesn't even like
you're doing them a huge disservice that
I guarantee you will cause lifelong
issues I tell parents as a general rule
of thumb if you don't have a spare
bedroom then don't allow family to stay
at your house for anything longer than a
day visit what you're doing is showing
your son that your feelings and his
grandmother's feelings are more
important than his which will cause him
to resent you both there's been so much
research that has gone into what makes
kids go no contact with their parents
once they leave home and this is exactly
what you're setting yourself up for you
ought to be ashamed of yourself for not
putting your son first if you refuse to
trust the clinical studies that have
been done how about trusting the adult
child of a family where this exact same
thing happened to me my Grandpa Ed would
stay over all the time and and I was
forced to share my room with them I
hated the way he always smelled like
cheese
[Laughter]
and the sound of when he spoke he
sounded so old I cringe now just
thinking about it he never stopped
talking and always had boring black and
white shows on my TV I got so fed up
with him that one night I made sure that
this would never be a problem again
nobody ever found out what I did and I
never regretted it my dad fell into a
deep depression and started drinking
because his father was pretty much his
best friend but that's what happens when
you cross the wrong person don't be
surprised if you end up in the exact
same situation I wouldn't blame your son
one bit
dude did this guy do what I think he did
yeah I was a canalza well who do you
think is the jerk OB or their son please
let us know I think that last commenter
was the jerk they should be locked up
don't want to pay me for my work all
right I'll undo it I'm naming the
company name because I've had many
issues with them and everyone should be
warned so I have to say this first
beware of working for the delivery
service shipped
today I picked up an order for delivery
it had gone promo money added on on
shift it was for delivery in a town that
is 15 minutes from the store of purchase
alright not too bad for 16 especially
since I live within 10 minutes of the
town I was delivering to I take it I go
to the store receive the groceries and
I'm on my Merry way
I send a text to the customer that I'm
on my way and will reach them before
this time no response so I give a quick
call it does a weird thing and ends
doesn't even go to voicemail huh
whatever I sent them a text get to the
house knock no answer leave the bag
outside the door and I walk away make it
to my car start the car the woman pokes
her head out on the porch door as I'm
about to leave you were very lovely
woman on the porch thank you for your
kindness waves me down looking highly
confused so I unfortunately stop the car
and get out the woman asks what this is
why your order ma'am I say looking all
happy I didn't order anything she says
oh no did anyone else in the house nope
oh no no no no so there's a wrong
address on the delivery I've never dealt
with this before and I have to leave to
catch a movie with friends in 30 minutes
cue me going door to door at each house
on that small Street while reaching out
to shipped support and while trying to
call the customer again does the same
weird thing with the phone I give up on
that I proceed to knock on doors nope
nope nope no bodies alright ship's
suggestion just drive back and return it
um no shipt I'm a delivery contractor
I'm not a volunteer nor am I a charity
I'm hired by you to fulfill deliveries
as far as I'm concerned I've delivered
to the address on file I'm not reaching
into my bank account to correct someone
else's mistake for the total extra 30
minute round trip only ten dollars on
top of the initial pay thanks gas for
being so expensive no they say we'll
give you 810 no I say I have plans now
in 10 minutes that I will have to miss
eight dollars and ten cents will not
cover the gas and wear and tear for the
extra 30 minutes I will need no less
than ten dollars or I will leave them on
the curb of the noted delivery address
we'll give you five dollars and can't do
any more than that they say wait I say
five dollars on top of the additional
810 to make it 1310 on top of what I'm
being paid or just five I want
everything in writing specifically
because I knew shift was going to do
exactly what they did next oh yes 1310
but we can't do any more they say fine
I'm returning it to the store now I say
go to the store do the whole return
process get in contact with shipt as
they directed me to with the requested
information get a message on my phone
from shipped to the effect of your order
has been canceled and twenty dollars
eighty cents issued to your account what
eye contact shipped say I'm confused say
it looks as though they were only giving
me five dollars on top of the original
order payment when they said I would be
compensated with 1310 I was told oh we
won't give you any more than five but
you already said is there someone else I
can speak to nope five dollars take it
early leave it alright fine don't want
to pay me the agreed upon wage that's a
breach of contract meaning you never
actually paid me for this return so what
did I do I marched right back into the
store asked the worker who had taken the
return that she had just gotten done
with I snatched the bag up Strode up to
the manager and formed them of what
happened and told them since I wasn't
being paid to return the groceries I
would be taking them back to the last
place I was contracted and paid to
deliver them I told him if he wanted to
be recompensated for the groceries he
could charge shift as they were not
willing to pay to have them returned
message shipped from my car informing
them of this and gave them 30 minutes
yep my plans were now ruined it's now
two hours later to rescind their
Ascension and pay me what they actually
agreed to and owed me had to reach out
two separate times because the first
girl despite my being very polite would
not go to anyone else such as management
to ask for an exception to this policy
considering they had literally told me
they would pay me more actually had the
gall to ask if I had taken items I had
returned and all I had to say in
response was did you pay me to return
them second girl was much more helpful
reached out to her team to see if
anything could be done shipt still
wouldn't be swayed but I thanked her
profusely for at least trying so in the
end they said they wouldn't do any more
than five dollars I told them all right
I reject that offer just pay me the
original delivery because 580 is where
they'll be you can pay another ship to
Shopper fifteen dollars to come get them
drove back it was on my way home dropped
them off and left I'm not a charity I
don't work for free and I certainly
don't pay to work I'm going to be
messaging ShopRite corporate directly
along with New Jersey labor board
because this is not the first issue with
wages I've had with shift and honestly
ShopRite should see compensation from
them have fun paying for the more than
thirteen dollars and 10 cents of
groceries that are now rotting on the
curb shift side note to anyone who may
say you're being entitled no I'm not
it's not entitled to expect an agreed
upon wage it's extortion to expect me to
work for less than agreed imagine you
accepted an order from a delivery
service fulfilled that obligation and
suddenly they decided to pay you less
than half for that completed order or
you're working at a job and they
suddenly cut your pay without any notice
or agreement upon your part as I
explained to them I never would have
returned the groceries for five dollars
because it wasn't my mistake would have
returned them no problem if it had been
and I would be paying to return them
plus the missed plans plus the lost time
so no I am in no way in the wrong and I
don't care what anyone who thinks
otherwise has to say am I the jerk for
telling my son I can't trust him I have
three kids a 15 year old son an
eight-year-old twin daughters they all
get along well and my son loves his
sisters and vice versa sometimes my
husband and I have to go to certain
events and I ask my son if he can watch
his sisters for the night he usually
says yes on unless he has plans I just
asked my mom then
so on Friday night we had an event to go
to and I again asked my son if he'd be
willing to babysit he said sure and that
was it
we came back at around midnight and I
went to check on the kids and my son was
fast asleep while one of the twins was
throwing up and the other one was crying
I was surprised but I also didn't really
blame my son in any way they weren't
really making any noise and were clearly
asleep before all heck broke loose well
I managed to calm them down and they end
up telling me how their big brother was
really mean and grumpy all day and when
they asked for food he gave them a jar
of peanut butter the twins cannot have
peanut butter they aren't allergic but
it makes them sick the girls know as
well but they were hungry and said that
they had to eat it my son knows this and
the peanut butter is kept out of the
twin sight in reach and is literally
only in the house for him I woke him up
the next morning and asked him if all of
this was true he just made a noise and
was all like those little snitches yeah
so they had a little peanut butter
what's the big deal I told him that he
knows they can't have it and not only
that but I also don't like how they
described his attitude especially when
he told them that they had to eat it he
just told me to stop overthinking he
forgot peanut butter makes them that
sick he only said they had to eat it
because he didn't want them going hungry
he didn't feel like ordering cooking or
warming up leftovers either and also the
Twins were being annoying I told him
that these excuses are not good enough
and that what he did was honestly kind
of cruel I told him that I don't know if
I can trust him anymore like this he
just rolled his eyes and told me that
I'm being really dramatic and that the
twins will be fine I don't need to act
like this he's really upset with me and
every time me or his dad say anything
he'll just reply with Oh I thought I was
cruel I thought you couldn't trust me
he's not budging and he's not normally
like this so I'm wondering am I the jerk
my sister told me to post on here since
I'm so conflicted didn't think it would
hurt
not the jerk please take all the peanut
butter out of the house they are
allergic just because it doesn't show in
the well-known ways doesn't mean that
they aren't that's the thing with
allergies sometimes the symptoms are
mild sometimes they're serious you're
very very lucky that their reaction
wasn't much worse especially with that
much peanut butter it's lucky you came
home to throwing up and crying and not
just crying or silence
am I the jerk for missing my
father-in-law's funeral after my
mother-in-law booked my husband first
class but me economy me 31 female and my
mother-in-law don't have a close
relationship she's civil towards me but
can be a bit passive aggressive at times
and we tend to disagree often times we
live in a different state father-in-law
passed suddenly and mother-in-law told
me and my husband to come attend the
funeral she booked our tickets to fly to
her state but the issue started when my
husband told me that we couldn't sit
together on the plane because his mom
had booked him a first class ticket
while I got economy I was flabbergasted
by this I tried asking him why but he
urged me to suck it up and we'll talk
about it later
in that moment that particular moment I
felt so much humiliation and contempt I
felt like she was treating me as less
than even in her hard times I decided to
not go and just go back home my husband
was shocked by my decision to go home
and try to convince me to just go but I
declined
he went alone and I ended up missing the
funeral he was livid just calling me and
texting me nasty things calling me Petty
and spoiled he said that I should be
grateful his mom paid for my ticket to
begin with then said that she doesn't
owe me a darn thing
I argued about how she could have just
booked us both an economy if money was
an issue but he called me pathetic for
thinking about it when his dad had just
passed he said it was cruel what I did
and that his mom and family will never
forget that I missed the funeral over
ridiculous reasons am I the jerk for
going home over this
ETA one of the reasons I didn't settle
for the economy ticket was because I
wanted to sit next to my husband and
support him he sobbed the whole ride to
the airport and I didn't want to leave
his side I was shocked when he told me
we couldn't sit together and how he said
it like he had no issue with it
everyone sucks here the seat issue was
more important than supporting your
husband after the passing of his father
this is exactly the point obviously
mother-in-law is a jerk and her actions
were uncalled for and Petty but you made
your husband go to his father's funeral
without the support of his spouse and
you did this over a first-class seat you
played right into your mother-in-law's
hands and may have caused irreparable
damage to your marriage
you're the jerk yes it was very crappy
for your mother-in-law to book you an
economy class while your husband was in
first class but you let a petty Coral
with your mother-in-law prevent you from
supporting your husband when he needed
you the most your husband has every
right to be upset you basically told him
that your grudge against your
mother-in-law is more important than
supporting him edit no I won't say
everyone sucks here the husband doesn't
suck and the Mother-in-law just lost her
lifelong partner has to pay for plane
tickets for two people and she wanted to
pay a little treat to her son I'm giving
her the benefit of the doubt that she
did this to spoil her son not to upset
you
everyone sucks here your mother-in-law
won it was most likely her intention to
cause a fight and she won because you
didn't go now she gets to bash you to
everyone for not attending you didn't
support your hubs when he needed it so
now all the nasty things she Whispers in
his ear while he's there he's going to
agree with regarding you you were put
into a losing situation either way the
whole thing sucks sorry this happened to
you
well what do you think is Opie The Jerk
for not going or not please let us know
I'm sure a husband could have offered to
switch with whoever was sitting next to
her and they probably would have been
glad to take his first class seat when
you have problems there are always
Solutions you just need to look for them
the only time I left is zero tip it was
today I'm a server at a busy downtown
restaurant and I usually have time to
make some coffee at home before work
yeah I could drink the coffee at work
but I like my Cafe Bustelo rather than
what we have at the restaurant just a
personal preference it's what got me
through undergrad alive so they forever
have my allegiance
today making a fresh pot at home just
wasn't going to happen because I
slightly mismanaged my time had to do a
company meeting thing with some higher
ups and also squeeze in a vet visit for
my new kitten before work time got a
little tight so I ended up heading into
my shift entirely uncaffeinated
no worries while I don't particularly
love energy drinks I figured I'd just
pop across the street and grab one at
the corner store I do so and when I
check out it's with one of those mini
iPads with a card reader I get my energy
drink and a pack of smokes for after
work and when I put my card into the
reader it automatically prompts me to
leave a 15 20 or 25 tip I'm almost 36
years old and my income has been
primarily dependent upon tips for
basically the entirety of my adult life
I understand this and I strive to always
pay it forward I start at 40 in a full
service setting and only go down if you
mess up colossally even then it
basically takes outright mistreatment
for me to go south of 25 percent I tip
20 on takeout I tip 25 on delivery heck
I almost always throw the person working
the window at Taco Bell or cook out of
five just for being open when I want to
eat some garbage after work this was the
first and only time in my entire life
where my whole being went are you
kidding me when being asked for a tip
now thankfully the guy working the
register's side and reached over to me
to hit the custom tip button and then
hit zero he looked at me inside sorry
about that man we just got this new
point of sale like two days ago and the
owners haven't figured out how to
disable that step yet I just gave him a
shrug and a nah it's all good man but
darn if I didn't get hot for a split
second thinking that the corner store
would have the audacity to ask for a tip
for ringing up an energy drink and a
pack of smokes so yeah technically
that's the only time I've ever been
given the option to leave a tip and was
totally fine with it being zero
tipping culture is quickly becoming a
scam I'm asked to tip everywhere now
it's just one more way corporations are
hiking up their consumers costs to
supplement the crappy wages they pay
employees yup it really is everywhere
I'm not tipping someone to make me a
coffee in a drive-through and I'm
certainly not tipping at the gas station
when I have to pump my own gas I tip for
personal service stuff and delivery and
that's it I'm gonna have to draw the
line at tipping at gas stations too I
really snubbed a bartender with a 20 tip
last night I always tip big I gave her
the benefit of the doubt the time before
bad day tired maybe but she's incredibly
rude and ignores me she acts like I'm
really disturbing her if I ask for a
drink I couldn't bring myself to give
less than 20 but I really wanted to
so the bartender was really rude to you
the whole night this wasn't the first
time it's happened and you still gave
her a 20 tip dude I am so done with you
Reddit people my Karen sister-in-law
thinks she can kick me out of my own
Beach House 12 years ago our
grandparents passed leaving their beach
house to me 37 female and my brother 35
male the places within drivable distance
of my town my work is such that I can do
it remotely a lot of the time I now have
two small kids because of these factors
through the years I've been in the beach
house much more basically summering it
in while my brother who lives much more
distant only crashes occasionally or
requests it for a couple of weeks while
I often used it through the winter
my brother is now married to my
sister-in-law 25 female my sister-in-law
has very specific ideas of what their
new married life will be like Pinterest
board custom hashtag for social media
affirmations posted around the house the
beach house features prominently in it
despite their having to drive four hours
to get to it she insists we should
divide time equally and leave it free if
they want it and that she may well
redecorate to make it more hers I have
redecorated that house to suit me I
asked my brother for no money except for
structural issues there are three
bedrooms so there are no reasons we
couldn't be there together my brother
literally told me he wasn't there enough
to care about swapping use of the main
bedroom which is the only seafront one
and in which my husband has built our
bed she wants that particularly claiming
it would be their perfect love nest I
think it's my bedroom and while she's
welcome to my brothers she can't have
mine as well we had established how to
work it I've built my patterns around it
and I don't want to change it now she
says she can't be there while we're
there because it would ruin the feeling
of retreat my brother is happy with
whatever she's happy with but I know
very well determined opposition on my
part will make him back down the last
discussion we had about it when I
appointedly asked would she like to live
laugh love on the kitchen table he
winced and left the room so if I want to
hold on to the house on my terms I can
but does it make me the jerk to be clear
I don't object to their being here more
I don't object to their having more
alone time I don't object to their
redecorating their room or bathroom
however I don't object to their bringing
some things in but I object to having to
swap my room after 12 years having her
overhaul spaces I redecorated and spent
money on and agreeing to a rigid 50 50
schedule when I already know my
brother's CBA with regular long drives
ETA you guys I'm totally fine with being
called the jerk but I find it hilarious
that people here think my brother is an
unfortunate and bullied Soul he left our
hometown to strike out on his chosen
career he did wonderfully he bought a
house before me and my husband did he
adores traveling abroad and until he met
sister-in-law he wasn't keen on romantic
commitment I'd spent weekends pottering
about the house and he'd fly back to
Bangkok to hike and that was wonderful
for both of us the issue here is that he
is conflict avoidant and unwilling to
discuss this with me and my
sister-in-law I certainly flipped out
and I'm happy admitting it and bringing
discussion back but believe you me he
wasn't in the beach house because he was
having the time of his life elsewhere
ETA 2 right people I think I heard
enough I've spoken to a mortgage advisor
as to how much I should offer and will
discuss it with my husband been reusing
our savings as deposit I will then offer
to my brother when we meet up to discuss
details being firmed up if I manage I'll
update one thing I want to say is it's
pretty laughable to me that people so
quickly assume I don't know my brother
or am strong arming him or bullying him
or whatever else I got use of the house
and he got someone else to maintain his
private ensuite for the one to two weeks
a year he wanted it sea view room might
be best for Lots but he rather wanted to
Annex a bathroom and that's what he did
they also aren't Airbnb this as some of
you suggested this isn't a random
vacation share it's a well-loved family
home that with my brother's full
knowledge consent and enjoyment of the
fact that everything was clean and
lovely and updated every time he came
here which was rarely I used more and
more over the years I trust my brother
to acknowledge that as for people change
when they get married if this was my
brother asking me these things it would
be different what I got was my
sister-in-law swanning in with demands
and him murmuring non-committally in the
background you are all very right I
should have brought it to him for first
though and that's on me but I hardly
denied his wishes because truth is his
wishes haven't changed they've been
together two years and his pattern of
using the house hasn't changed she just
thinks it will because now she has
redone their main home she wants another
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