this episode was brought to you by raid
shadow legends
for decades now people have been arguing
what is the best baby food for an adult
to consume
this has led to countless heated debates
among family
friends and scientists and today we'll
settle it once and for all with this
tier list
now it's important that we note that
this was recorded
two days prior to the nationwide recall
of baby food
due to finding arsenic lead and other
toxic materials in the baby food
so we got the original formula we got
the full experience of what it was like
to be a baby
so join us as we throw on our bibs and
dive into some toxic
waste yep cheers
cheers
okay do you guys want to start with
start
this is so tight i need to rip it our
first one is
turkey and gravy
okay i'm not excited about them i am
super excited to be honest
i'm just going to keep the meat ones
here oh there's no [ __ ] way a baby
can open that
no chance through ready
oh we should do it in secret and have
them try to guess what the meat is
ready cheers you barely got any get a
big
gross it's turkey and gravy
wow
it's like sand if it was like
a little bit yeah like a little urine
maybe
[Applause]
ground turkey water corn starch
oh wow did that taste like turkey
no yeah that is regretting
all of his decisions right are you
taking another bite no i'm just doing a
deeper analysis
here yeah let me smell it it's it does
smell like it smells like
you know what it reminds me of did you
ever have that like ground chicken
instead of the ground tuna
yeah yeah so it smells a little bit like
the ground chicken it tastes
like a charlie starcus sorry charlie
tuna like the bag the bag tuna
tuna so that explains it that's what it
tastes like
knowing what i know now hindsight's 2020
there's a good chance that that batch of
turkey and gravy was just actually
poison
which is why it tasted so absolutely
foul
it's an easy f tier i would highly
recommend against getting turkey and
gravy
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i want you guys to try to guess it no it
wasn't but it's chicken and gravy
chicken
they're revolutionizing the meat ground
world this one looks a lot
finer as a paste i'm getting good scoops
[Music]
here how the [ __ ] did you survive past
infancy with this kind of flavor
let me get you each one he's starting to
cry someone's broke
yeah that that needs help oh [ __ ] this
it's pretty [ __ ] bad you're under
babies
yeah what the [ __ ] matt can handle spice
but i can handle baby food better
you can just handle [ __ ] yeah
it ain't no baby beating me in another
contest
oh you have water well thank you [ __ ]
bad
oh it's getting worse too the more the
flavor sits on your tongue the more
it's like drying my mouth out it's like
taking a handful of salt
and like crushing your taste buds with
it
i can't focus on the flavor i'm gonna
puke it's really bad
i'm sorry it's taking so long for this
to fill i'm actually
shocked by how awful these two have been
so far
my god those are like good flavors too
that's what i would have expected right
thank you
matt's entering the zen mode
yeah it smells like a baby's dirty
diaper right now i mean i can give you
something that may spoil the taste of
everything
oh thank you it's perfect
the turkey the turtle the turkey was at
least the chicken wasn't as popular i
could swallow the chicken the turkey
made me
spit it out the jar of chicken and gravy
was a slight improvement though not by
much pretty negligible
i'd say the formula still needs some
refining maybe take out some of the
arsenic
uh this is also another easy f tier uh
the turkey and chicken is absolutely
shocking at how horrible they are yeah
the chicken what other [ __ ] meats did
they give us
beef oh my god it's beef i thought i was
joking that's beef and grit why is
everything and gravy
because that's how they make an excuse
for grinding it up
oh it's so [ __ ] yucky that's saying
big red letters
do not heat in microwave oven contain
air contents may splatter causing burns
babies can't even use microwaves [ __ ]
idiots
it's a spit bowl i was just trying to
keep it off the side
i i'm going to hypothesize this is going
to be the worst i agree
completely oh i like it they
they left it rare yeah yeah it's medium
rare
my cats eat better than this i'm not
sure a hundred percent this smells like
wet dog food
oh oh oh oh look at this
ew
oh yeah that's better why is it pink
who thinks babies don't want well done
beef oh
it looks like refried beans oh
oh my god oh
they're so gross
i think this is gonna be the worst you
know what that reminds me of
what like when my mom makes brisket and
stuff the fat that sits around
it like that fat you would dump in the
cup to throw away that's what that is
that texture is horrible i'm closing it
no smells no nothing
that'll put some hair on that baby has
called demons into this house
that is yuck no wonder babies cry all
day
yeah wow i definitely do want to do a
breast milk tear looks like maybe that's
where all the good stuff is
that's where babies get strong yeah this
is yucky
babies wake you up in the middle of the
night because they're saying [ __ ] you
for feeding them this
oh god yeah this is agonizing in a
surprise to absolutely no one the beef
and gravy was by far the worst one
up until this point truly on a whole new
level of
horrible i i'm honestly questioning if
it's even beef in the first place i
think this is just like
a human flesh that they ground up and
put a fake gravy on it's
it's it's super super bad easy f a turbo
f ham and gravy
if i don't know what world this is ham
but it's
pure what world did somebody sit there
and say you know what babies need
pork yeah this is the thing it's like
marshmallow case oh my god
it looks like fat tissue let me see i
think that would come out in one chunk
pop means it's fresh oh my god it looks
like adipose you're right it's
like mayonnaise oh oh wow
oh oh oh no
i gained all this why why is the top
like a gray in the inside
there's so much beef residue on my spoon
my munchkin i've never been i've never
been so excited to eat mushed carrots
before
oh my thank you my munchkin is ruined do
you need one mat
yeah you should clean your chimney i did
smell like cat food in here
yeah a hundred percent i'm not joking my
cats eat better food than this
no [ __ ] doubt all right ready no
why does it make a peak why why is it
like that there you go
thank god it's not as bad as the beef
but it's still pretty bad of the four
that's the best one oh great it's the
it's always worse
yeah it's it's bad but at least it's not
like
super flavorful it's much more
plain
that's dreading it's coming in the trash
god
oh that's the highest one though that's
that's like a d tier
at least it i'm shocked that you're
pulling out of emptier
well compared to the other because it is
better if i was only rating these four
that gets
the highest tier by far but i'm really
hoping we'll keep it enough yeah
we'll we'll wait and see yeah like it
doesn't taste like ham
all of these have a very similar taste
some just have more [ __ ] in it
yeah like i feel like in the composting
maybe
the process changes a little bit but the
formula is kind of the same
i have a headache my body thinks i'm
poisoning it yeah
matt didn't know how right he was
knowing what we know now about what was
in
baby food uh yeah the ham it was still
bad but of the four it was definitely
the strongest it was the one that didn't
pack as much of a
repugnant punch so it's still gonna be
an f tier because
it's still [ __ ] horrible but at least
it was better than the other three
well don't worry we have some natural
green beans to help with that
i put those in order from what would
probably be worst to best
so you could end with them have you ever
liked green beans
well i've never had them mushed i've
never liked green beans
this is kind of a breakfast vegetable
you still got some meat on yours under
there yours is like
thanksgiving dinner on a spoon
it does taste like green beans but like
we're in a blender why do we do this
as a human race babies need to just get
strong
we need to start making our babies
tougher just eat five guys
yeah just give them a burger eat some
good food
you stupid babies play some rock and
roll for them
yeah i just never liked green beans but
that tastes like what i remember them
yeah it tastes like green beans but the
texture is offensive
yeah the texture compared to the meat
it's better i guess
let's read the ingredients green beans
sounds easy
oh that's it you know i'm no fan of
green beans but this just tasted like
green beans if you just crushed them in
your hand
a lot and then ate them so it's it's
what you'd expect with green beans
as advertised but since i'm not a fan
i'm just going to give it a d
i think you're only going to like these
if you really like green beans
but even if you really like green beans
you're probably not going to like them
as much
mashed beet pear and pomegranates
looks a little bit like a smoothie a
little bit this one's probably gonna be
good like i said i'm getting excited
as a regular yeah i think this one's
gonna be good
oh this is where the fine dining for
babies comes in this is like some tommy
pickles delight
yeah let's see
dad now we're cooking now we're [ __ ]
cooking all right
let me get some more of that yeah
it's time to feast holy [ __ ] get the
meat flavor out of my mouth baby
this is good
i like it i need a bigger munchkin
that's just a this is spoon name
this is great
um since we haven't tried these yet i
don't know but it's like applesauce yeah
with a little more personality there's
an apple it's a flavored apple sauce
yeah it's applesauce going through like
a phase
after trying the others i can safely say
it's an s tier yeah the beaten
pomegranate
actually is slapping like this is pretty
this is pretty solid stuff right here
they accidentally finally made something
taste decent
butternut squash coming up i don't like
squash i do like squash
tetra really wants some baby food she
really liked the
chicken oh you gave her some of the yeah
the
chicken
pop always reminds me of those old
snapple bottles yeah
let's go i like butternut squash i think
this is just going to be
a banger
oh yeah yeah not a banger i don't like
that at all
it's not a banger nope that is not oh
that's nice it's good
worse
i'd eat the whole jar of green beans
over there yeah i don't know what
happened with that squash i like squash
let me have some more nice palette
cleanser
yeah i don't know this is butternut
squash i struggle to give something an
f after the meat but that's pretty close
yeah this is definitely not good
it's it's not is it old yeah it's not
even like plain it just tastes like it's
turned
yeah it like slowly was attacking my
mouth the longer it went on
yeah well that's a shame i like
butternut squash it hurt me to
taste what they had done to butternut
squash butternut squash
is absolutely a banger until it's made
for babies i don't know what they do in
there they just dump some
actual rat poison in there or something
but it's bad it's [ __ ] bad it's a d
tier it's a shame babies deserve higher
quality food
this is just carrots carrots all right
read the ingredient list
oh yeah double check carrots nice
go ahead i think this is going to be
fine
carrots all day tastes like carrots
that's just carrots
it's like carrots after i've chewed for
30 seconds yeah
it's just skipping part of the process
for me
it's not great i want more of this this
is a good one
the pomegranate ones they have but they
should do that again
yeah it's pretty good you think they can
make this for adults maybe
do we have the technology
yeah can they just make a jar four times
bigger i don't think so
it's impossible you're welcome any of
the babies watching this video
oh wait i thought these were all gerber
maybe gerber only makes dog [ __ ]
the carrots were exactly as you would
expect it just tasted like some chewed
carrots that were mama birded into my
mouth
carrots are fine i have no problem with
carrots i'm just gonna give this a seat
here middle of the pack
you get exactly what you expect well no
the last one here if you want to get
another gerber out of the way i have
carrots
we have regular apple oh
let's see if gerber can reclaim their
throne apple and gravy
what were you thinking about carrots
it's it's super mediocre
it's fine i mean it is just it is
literally just carrots
it's not exciting like a baby's not
going to be like pumping its [ __ ]
fists in there for carrots
let's see is this just apple apple and
vitamin c
i'm on to you gerber let's see
it's worse than applesauce yeah it's no
sugar
what the hell can babies process sugar
do we know
if there's any babies in the comments
let me know let us know
not until they're one no that's when the
sugar sugar uh processing genes kick in
i mean it's fine though fine is the word
i would use it
it is absolutely a worse applesauce it's
like applesauce you would get with
school lunch growing up
mm-hmm yeah yeah yeah
you want to move on matt really summed
it up best it tastes like applesauce
you'd get it a school lunch
it's not great but it's fine you know
you get it you're like yep that's
applesauce okay
kind of enjoying it a little bit because
i mean apples taste good
so it's a b tier for sure you want
another bite let me just
i haven't eaten breakfast so yeah i
haven't either this is actually so
exciting for the others
mango mango mango i didn't know baby's
got such
bougie food yeah jesus christ what's
next dragon fruit
my munchkin too fine it was on your
placemat that's why we have them
oh that's real liquidy it's really
liquidy
that's a weird texture it's like a paint
can are you waiting for a cheers yeah
yeah
nice
that's interesting that's i'm conflicted
it's good it's confusing though
yeah the texture is really weird i do
you like mango i do like mango okay i
feel like if you like mango this is
really just liquefied mango it's pretty
good
it's really thick and creamy yeah it
kind of tastes like mango flavored
bacardi
is there any alcohol in this not that
they've listed
this is that's why babies puke so much
yeah well they're all just getting drunk
on mango bacardi
imagine
yeah really i just keep coming back this
might have to be a nest ester
i think the baby food you're not beating
the pomegranate not really good
yeah the mango's not bad though let's
let's not you know
mislead anyone here yeah like if you're
good if you're stuck on a desert island
surrounded only by baby food jars
the mango is going to get you by yeah if
you're a baby looking for a sweet treat
mango will get you there
[Laughter]
what percentage of your audience do you
think is under one year tall
oh god god only knows i mean right now
i'm competing with baby shark and stuff
it's a cut-throat competition to claim
that audience
again real middle-of-the-pack [ __ ] the
mango was
just fine and honestly i wouldn't be
surprised if it comes out eventually
that there is alcohol and baby food with
all the crazy [ __ ] that they found in
there so
maybe i'm right on the money and i'm
going to look like a prophet when they
do a deeper investigation on the [ __ ]
but for now
uh just as the mango is i'm just giving
it a beat here
all right to finish it off we have
banana just plain banana yeah it's all
right i don't know why it's like
beige though
banana colors usually aren't beige
they're more like a
oh maybe we're on to them uh oh
oh they're trying to pass ham and banana
off at the same thing i hope it's
actually just i wonder if they
mix them yeah is there a ham nana all
right let's
go i got a little meat smell and it
really [ __ ] me up
the last last one
that's pretty playful that was confusing
yeah
that's not what i expected at all it's
got more tang than a banana that's all
what kind of bananas
banana lemon oh lemon juice concentrate
that's where that tang comes from yeah
they're playing god right now holy [ __ ]
i don't mind it i also don't mind it
it's pretty [ __ ] good actually
why don't they just call it banana lemon
maybe people would never think i should
give my baby lemon
yeah because lemon's kind of strong for
is that legal though is this false
advertising i didn't buy bananas
um making it last longer no those have
lemon
yeah none of those have lemon none not
even apple
you know what more gram maybe it's so it
doesn't brown
that could be it i've eaten too much
baby food and my stomach's starting to
hurt
there's just mush in my stomach no the
stomach so that
you know the stomach by him loves mush
that's why babies are so strong let me
see this real quick no
i got an idea uh oh
a row reggie
he's doing it he went where no man
should go
it's not great stick with good banana
yeah i think just banana is going to be
better
you know you actually do get a lot of
bang for your buck like i've already
taken nine munchkin dips in here mm-hmm
it's still going still plenty of banana
left and you've had munchkin dips yeah
man this would be a whole lot of meals
for a banana for a baby is that the new
meal prep formula we just stocked the
warehouse with baby food
at least you definitely do that like
little pieces of chicken in one of these
yeah you do banana and apple in the
morning
you get you come in for your snack with
beet pear and pomegranate and you finish
with a ham dinner
my [ __ ] stomach's actually turning as
well it really does not feel great
that's weird i don't know why we like to
lose the enzymes to process
baby food i think it's just moving very
quickly through your system
because you don't have to do anything to
it that's a really good point
what would you say banana is on the list
for you
it's up there with pomegranate i agree i
don't think it's it's better than apple
i don't think it's as good as
pomegranate but it's definitely a close
competition
uh yeah overall though as long as you're
not feeding your baby you need meat
[ __ ] those meat baby foods yeah they'll
probably be pretty happy
but i mean if you're feeding the meat
they're probably gonna hold a grudge for
life
rightfully so you know i would yeah that
was gross disgusting that was so bad
all right now we graduate to toddler
food all right
and to finish it all off i'm happy to
say banana was not a disappointment
it tasted just fine not as good as the
pomegranate in fact i wouldn't even say
it was on the same level which is why
i'm going to be putting banana at an a
tier
but you really can't go wrong with
pomegranate or banana and the baby food
aisle
pretty solid stuff and some pretty
absolutely eye-opening garbage for baby
food so
really just a wild experience all around
that's it see ya