[Music]
so terry comes in with this confederate
sword
now if this thing is real i want it oh
it's real i know cause my grandpa gave
it to me well it seems legit but
you know how it goes i still gotta call
my guy
why it's real
[Music]
hey earl thanks for coming in on such
short notice i was at lunch when you
called i had to skip the lunch
well what we have here seems to be a
civil war cavalry saber it's in pretty
good condition considering i'm starving
i haven't eaten all day
it was gonna be a pretty big lunch so i
skipped breakfast in anticipation for
the lunch so i'm actually really hungry
right now i want you to take a look
under the pommel here are these initials
or a maker's mark they were literally
bringing my food to the table when you
called i barely got to smell it before i
had to leave your producers said they
were going to grab my leftovers but i
don't see them anywhere so i guess i'll
starve
well i ask because terry here has
paperwork that says this sword belonged
to colonel mustard slaver himself
i'm hungry
you know they told me my son was here
they said he crashed his bike and that
he needed help
i'm pretty sure that's illegal and if i
don't eat something soon i'm gonna throw
up the thing is slaveler was left-handed
and this is a right-handed blade they're
not gonna hold my table
at mongiano's i was at my favorite
restaurant mongiano's it takes weeks to
get a reservation there and they're not
gonna hold my table it's restaurant
policy
you could have just sent me a picture of
this you know like literally two
pictures i could have told you what i
thought but instead you made me worried
about my son and now my dinner is ruined
i thought it was your lunch if i eat
lunch now it'll be too late and i won't
be hungry for dinner so my dinner is
ruined i can't just eat one meal a day
if i keep doing that i'll die
this is rubber
thanks for coming in earl [ __ ] off
give you a quarter mil for the sword
best i can do
[Music]
i told hank to go [ __ ] himself i know my
sword is worth way more i'm just happy i
got an accurate appraisal
i hit a car
is this your car
no
okay i'm just gonna walk home
[Applause]
[Music]
hey thanks for watching please like and
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beachside retro if you're ever thrifting
in cocoa beach go check them out they
were literally bringing my food to the
table when you called i barely got to
i don't see them anywhere so
i'm gonna throw up