greg is a simp we all know this there's
numerous times where he breaks his back
to get a girl who doesn't even care
about him seriously here in book 4 greg
sees heather hills at church and with
just a glance decides to rethink his
entire summer and plant it trying to get
a high school girlfriend and he goes
about this by camping beneath her on
lifeguard duty and basically becoming
her servant seriously he states himself
that he would do anything for her as he
really just sat near her for hours and
basically just did her job for her and
then thinking that saying something
witty like judging a pregnant lady for
wearing a bikini is somehow definitely
impressing her because sarcastic remarks
about eight-month-year-old pregnant
woman at the pool is essentially the
textbook way to pick up girls but it's
not even just that he refills her water
every time she was low like a butler on
an unpaid internship and every time she
changes stations he follows her around
so much so where he knows that every
fourth shift he ends up near his mother
this goes beyond just trying to be nice
or getting to know someone he's
literally following her around and doing
her job and like mo simps mentality i'm
sure he's thinking that if i do
everything for her she's gotta like me
but i'm pretty sure that she just sees
him as a weird ass kid who really wants
to be a lifeguard but that's only one
example during valentine's day he tries
to get one of the girls he likes and
writes a pretty
interesting poem for you a fire blazes
in my heart so strong that the embers
could you get the points like [ __ ] calm
down shakespeare aren't you in middle
school the [ __ ] are you talking about
only your kids could quench the flames
of my nuts or whatever the hell you
wrote to this now traumatized 12 year
old funniest thing is she didn't even
have a card for him after she read it
she fished around for a card and then
crossed out her friend's name and put
his on some walgreens card which feels
bad man alright moving on you may think
he's just thinking about girls because
of puberty or something but nope he's
been the same way since elementary
school the guys were berating girls with
heinous insults and greg just out of
nowhere jumps into the conversation and
tries to defend them on top of that
saying he does this all the time he's
not only a symp but also one of those
annoying ass dudes who butt into your
conversation hey you want to go to the
strip club bro get out of my room i'm
recording
we'll go later and it's not like doing
all this got him anywhere either i mean
later on they were using him to pass the
note to talk trash about him which is
some next level disrespect that's like
if you were the delivery guy delivering
a knife to the serial killer that was
going to use it to stab you honestly i
kind of feel bad for the guy but at the
same time he doesn't really make it easy
to like him here's another example i'm
gonna grab this real quick greg's been
going to the same dentist since he was
two and refuses to change because he's
in love with the hygienist who works
there he goes there wearing cologne
since he probably thinks smelling nice
will be able to replace talking to her
since unfortunately other than
responding with
you can't really talk while the dentist
is poking at your teeth with metal
sticks so greg's idea was to instead
just stare directly in her eyes the
entire time so he would seem interested
in oral hygiene but this is like rule
number one on the don't do list it's
like if you're getting a haircut don't
stare at your barber the entire time
it's weird and it's not like he was just
looking at her this was a dead-on
wide-eyed stare this really doesn't do
much for greg other than just make him
look super creepy now a common phrase
you'll hear regarding sims is hoes
before bros and greg displays this
perfectly rally's being babysat by
heather and grey goes over to his house
just so he can try to pick her up again
by wearing cologne which is probably
just a bottle of axe from cvs and he
really thinks it's gonna work though i
mean he's done this cologne thing three
books apart anyways he then makes sure
to sit right next to her the entire time
and won't even move for rally so he just
makes the kids stand there i mean he
could have just moved the chips to the
floor but i don't know maybe he values
the chips more than rally also not sure
why he didn't just let him sit since it
would have made him closer to heather
stupid in another instance rally is
really excited to share his trip from
mexico to greg and then he attempts to
undermine his excitement with his own
experiences but later on he notices some
girls giving rally attention for his
trip so greg uses rally as a way to
start a conversation with some random
chick while obviously not giving two
craps about rally and then later on
tries to use rally as some sort of
wingman by having him tell a group of
girls that he has big muscles as he
awkwardly stands by a wall also what
muscles because from what it seems every
person in this series is either morbidly
obese or a literal stick figure and i've
mentioned these two before but real
quick he's broken riley's arm and then
attempted to use him so that he could
somehow get noticed for once in his life
and even worse they're just chilling and
then a new girl in the neighborhood
moves in and his first thought is to
clock rally in the back of his head so
he can have her to himself
i mean i gotta give him some props
though it takes some level of courage or
maybe just stupidity to go after this
many girls
i mean every other scene is someone
different but nonetheless that still
doesn't change the fact that he's a simp
and we should probably change the title
of the book here you go thank you
nice
hey guys just wanted to thank you all
for watching and hopefully i'll see you
next time take it easy and shout outs to
15 patreon line peace